Latest Publications

Obama and Zakaria Agree: All White People Look the Same

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Chuckles ensue as President Barack Obama points out a group of caucasions taking photos.

“The best part about that photo is that every white American can hang it up in their house and say it was them on a visit to China.”

Hahahaha!  Obama and Zakaria then proceeded to give each other dap and point out fashion atrocities like the ‘fanny pack’ and ‘crocks.’

Tea Party Interviews

Gotta love this.  Interviews with many of the tea party activists from the D.C. rally.

ACORN provides much needed service to up and coming pimps

Fulfilling a much needed role in the pimping as well as human cargo industries, ACORN has stepped in as the premier consultant to burgeoning pimps as they attempt to secure public capital in their startup ventures.  ACORN is now being touted as the industry leader and offers services from assistance in startup fiscal policies and acquisition of young talent from South American markets to maintenance of assets and corporate organization.

While the old adage “pimpin ain’t easy” still applies, ACORN eases those woes by transforming your cheap whorehouse into a well controlled brothel where ‘hoes’ are now ‘performing artists.’  With assistance from ACORN you can secure public assistance for your facility, enslaved workforce and management team leaving you to focus on the ever important task of keeping your pimp hand strong.

See related testimonials: CNN, YouTube, Wall Street Journal

Contractors Outnumber Troops in Afghanistan!!!

In a horribly believable situation, the number of contractors outnumber U.S. troops in Afghanistan.  I always knew the ratio was extremely high but I never thought it was near this level.

What concerns me most is that our government has seen fit to make a business out of war.  Since the very nature of business is to survive and to create profits it reasons to argue that business will inevitably perpetuate or attempt to prolong conflict in order to sustain itself.  This is without mentioning what is the crux of the argument from most in that “abuses and crimes committed by armed private security contractors and interrogators against local nationals may have undermined U.S. efforts in Iraq and Afghanistan,” as the CRS report noted.

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Read it here.

Get the report here.

San Antonio Men’s Club Dodgeball Champions!!

It’s official.  I was on my first winning dodgeball team for a tournament that was held at our local San Antonio Men’s Club.  We were down to the ever fantastic Mr. Ickey’s by 2 games but rallied to take the title, trophy and $600 cash.  Holla!!

Yes, there was a bouncy castle with a slide on it, free SWAG from Miller Lite, a dunk booth and tons of free food.  Tons of fun and well done.

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The trophy.

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Vinnie, Joe, Tracie, Jeremy and Preson’s leg.

Why Is This A News Story??

I’m not sure why this isn’t a one word story.

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The story should read: “Luck!”